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some updates:
this booklust is rendering me bankrupt!
in a span of two weeks, i finally got a copy of Process Recess 3 by James Jean, a Yoshitaka Amano novel, Vertigo Tarot by Dave McKean, Wicked by Gregory Maguire (I've read this before, took me years to finally decide to own one) and Fables 15: Rose Red. and finished reading all of them in a breeze. Now Im bored again.

Ive been getting most of the stuff from my wishlist recently. And I don't know if that's a good or a bad thing. For one, if i get what i wished for, i have nothing more to do. This sense of contentment would render me purposeless for the rest of my life or most of it. And I've only dropped a few coins in the well. (yung mga five and ten peso coin nalang ang natitira) Actually, what's left in my list are the places I want to go to abroad (which are likely to happen in the not-so-distant-future imo). It can be a bit scary.

Then there's work. And the irritating question of what i've been up to being unemployed. I hate to admit that it gets disturbingly depressing to answer that it is because of my condition and not on my personal verdict to call a job quits. Like i still have no control of what happens in my life. I am thankful to be given this sabbatical of sorts but this indefiniteness is killing me. I like things to go as planned. But as they say, color your life with the chaos of trouble.

A note: it doesn't mean that when I open up something to you, you have the right to address the issue without my consent/whenever you want. have some discretion. some topics are not easy to swallow lest easy to digest. Read more...

Summer has Just Started

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Summer just started a day before the storm came. Family outing at Real, Quezon.
Our itinerary was supposed to be a balsa or a raft boat trip along the mangroves but ended up somewhere (because the boat was being used by someone else)

we ended up going here instead. Good choice.
Balagbag Falls
It's a 3-hour drive from Manila.
Take the Real-Mauban coastal road for another 20 minutes and you're there!
No major hike required. It's meters away from the road

For height reference.

The falls is quite big, and multi-layered. We were also fortunate that there are no other guests around. We had the whole place for ourselves! Think about having a resort closed for private use. Oh yeah, entrance fee is Php 20 per head. You can also rent their huts

There are two more layers above this, but one is enough
The oldies don't go very far

The day was also cloudy, which is to my advantage, it didn't rain. thank God it's Friday
We stayed at the falls for a while, my brothers and cousins diving from the second layer down the first. I also wanted to dive but alas, I don't know how to swim well.

We left by 5pm
We could see the rain coming towards us from Mauban side, but we were fearless.
And headed straight for it despite it being already late when we packed and
that most of us are riding at the back of the pick-up truck
Another falls is located straight this coastal road. Nunok falls if Im correct.
But we didn't go there

Headed back to our house at Real after
And what we filled our bellies with.
Adobong Pusit
and Inihaw na Isda

Then some Paco Salad. With Vinegar, Salted egg, tomatoes and onions

No more karaoke after this. All were tired from that adventure
End :)

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Of birds, moons & monsters

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peregrine falcon & black-hooded pitta,
birds that can be found here in the philippines
watercolor on acid-free paper + a little photoshop for paper texture

listening to MGMT and friendly fires to bring up the good vibes, i need it yeah
they put much poetry into their lyrics which i love

Of birds, moons and monsters // MGMT
Why'd you cut holes in the face of the moon base?
Don't you know about the temperature change
In the cold black shadow?
Are you mad at your walls
Or hoping that an unknown force can repair things for you?
Pardon all the time that you've thrown into your pale grey garden?
If the ship will never come you've got to move along

Even a bird would want a taste of dirt from abyssal dark
The prick of a feather could make a kingdom burn and the bloodshed start
The falling apart
Made me a shadow in the shape of wonder
The waves of black
If she's going under I can hold my breath till the sky comes back
Or drown like a rat, rat, rat
He's a rat!

To catch a monster
We make a movie
Set the tempo
And cut and cut its brains out
It will inspire on the burning pyre
Half the distance
Half the motion
Communication
It's easy as the ocean


of moons and monsters: i've been having a mix of nightmares ever since my grandmother died. Nothing about her actually. More of a subliminal meaning. Ive been dreaming about robbery heists, terror attacks and lots of running and falling. I sleep very late at night, sometimes already at sunrise and when I start dreaming, I can't get myself to wake up from the nightmare. Especially when it looks too real (as if IRL) and ends up to be a dream within a dream within a dream. Inception? Ive had this often before.

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Posted in

Hot Weather

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If there was something I really wanted to do right now, it's this.
Ive been wanting to learn scuba diving since highschool
Some rantings. But then again, there are medical restrictions I have to bear in mind. This is my first year of summer without sea, Ive been tempted a couple of times to tag along with my Dad in our island and sneak out to the ocean but then again, I do not want to experience the same pain I had last year. (I did sneak in on our last trip and got sick for a couple of days). I really really feel frustrated!

Wishfully thinking about scuba diving - other than having SLE, is that Im also myopic. How am i to see underwater? And financially, my mother has borrowed all of my money (in which case I have to wait for her to pay me before I am able to do anything else). It would also be lousy that in any case I would want to go dip in seawater, it's either I don't go out at 9am to 4pm or come out in full wetsuit (with hood, mind you) and tons of SPF. So I guess I have to wait another year. Ive waited for this long enough, I can tolerate this waiting game. Underwater photographer dream has got to wait!

More on SLE: My prednisone is down by 1mg. Slow. Unless i get this steroid out of my system They're pretty much restricting me from most stuff (and that maroon 5 concert, oh!). I really hope this isn't a lifetime-kind-of-thing. I want a normal life. More of good news, test results are getting better, maybe a couple more months before it reaches normal just have to be more patient. This heat is killing me!


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